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Showing posts from October 19, 2008

Congratulations, but not on your spelling

A beautifully decorated cake can be a great way to say "congratulations."

Unless, of course, you spell it "cangrtalation."

This is truly amazing.

Source: Cake Wrecks.

Incredible pumpkin carvings

Next week I will perform a very basic pumpkin carving that my kids will think is great because they have very low expectations. If I can even get the eyes centered right and the facial features to be balanced, it will be a small miracle.

To make sure my kids aren't disappointed, I'll make sure they don't see these carvings from Villafane Studios.

Another reason to end Disney on Ice

Tough luck for hockey fans in Huntsville, Ala. Last night's hockey game between the Hunstsville Havoc and the Columbus Cottonmouths was canceled because of ice conditions.

Who is to blame?

Disney on Ice. After this weekend's Disney on Ice show, the Von Braun Center staff was not able to prepare the ice for hockey and ensure the safety of the players, Havoc officials said. Just too much fast-paced skating by Goofy, Mickey and the other Disney skaters. Maybe Pluto attempted too many triple toe loops.

Reached for comment about the situation, Mickey said, in an annoyingly high voice, "Heh, heh, Sorry," while placing his huge mouse hands in front of his face to create the international mascot sign for "Oh no!"

Fans were able to receive refunds for the tickets, which I'm sure were quite expensive for a game featuring a team named the "Cottonmouths."

Backyard cremation, and it gets weirder

The daughter and grandson of an 84-year-old Tehama County woman who apparently died in December have been arrested on suspicion of cashing her retirement and Social Security checks after they allegedly cremated her body on a makeshift barbecue behind their Edith Avenue home.

Yes, that qualifies as bizarre. But if you read more here, you'll discover other details such as how the daughter had made a necklace out of her mother's remains and this: The culvert had been used by the family as a makeshift barbecue, he said, noting that the family had used it to cook their Thanksgiving turkey several weeks before Allmond's death.

It's not known if they used it after the alleged cremation.

"I hope not," Hosler said.

The Snuggie is a real product

This is not a Saturday Night Live commercial parody, it just looks like one. The Snuggie is a real product, and it gives you the freedom to stay warm while using your hands!

Also makes a great costume for anyone who wants to dress up as a monk for Halloween. I think my favorite part is when it says "similar products sell for up to sixty dollars."

So I guess there are similar products out there.

Humor Me: Where's the actual cat?

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By MATT WIXON

While walking my dogs around the neighborhood a while back, I saw a flyer for a lost cat. It looked like a typical flyer, looking for a typical cat with a typical name. I’ve changed the name to protect the innocent, but I’ll call the cat “Fluffy.”

I thought that Fluffy was part of a typical flyer. But as I looked closer, I noticed that under a huge photo of a cat, which I presumed to be Fluffy, were these words:

NOT ACTUAL CAT

The disturbing flyer brought up a couple of questions:

1. How dumb does Fluffy’s owner think we are? OK, so there wasn’t a photo of Fluffy available when he/she/it skedaddled out the door. But did Fluffy’s pursuer need to include a generic photo of such an exotic animal? (I would think not, but just in case, I included a photo of a cat. But it's not the actual cat that is "not actual cat" in the flyer.)

Anyway, how many people in the cat-fancied Dallas area, let alone planet Earth, are not familiar with a cat?

Cat? What’s a cat? If you w…