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Showing posts from May 27, 2012

Humor Me: Lights, camera, spell it or else

On Thursday, the finals of the Scripps National Spelling Bee will be aired on ESPN, the humble little network that bills itself as the “worldwide leader in sports.” Can you imagine how those kids will feel as they stand on the stage, staring into the cameras of the worldwide leader in self-importance? Lots of pressure. Each kid must feel like he or she is swimming in a huge ocean and is just a little humuhumunukunukuapuaa. No, I didn’t just fall asleep on the keyboard. That’s an actual word that could come up in the Spelling Bee. It’s the name of a small Hawaiian triggerfish. If you’d like some help pronouncing it, it starts with an “h” sound. If I had really fallen asleep while writing this column, you might’ve seen something like nergqwenjgkm, fewpkkwkdsa or goraaaaafnssanFDADFA (with left temple hitting the caps lock). But you wouldn’t see floccinaucinihilipilificate because, well, you need to know how to spell to get that one. Or just get lucky, I guess. But it’s

Humor Me: The Maggie column

I said I would post a link to the column when it ran in The Dallas Morning News. Here it is: https://twitter.com/humorcolumn/status/206720354683592704 Most of the sports columns that I write for The News are in a "subscribers only" area, but I don't think this one will be a problem if you connect through the link above. I hope everyone has a great Memorial Day weekend. The column includes some photos of Maggie (always photogenic, even in her old age) and me (always awkward). Follow @humorcolumn