Friday, August 1, 2008

Wheel of Fortune spelling problems

To be a Wheel of Fortune contestant, you generally have to be overly enthusiastic. But to win on the show, you need to be able to spell.

I feel bad for this poor guy. He screws up twice.

But he's not alone. Here's a good collection:

Thursday, July 31, 2008

Exercise in a pill

Exercise in a pill? Maybe.
Today's booming gym business could start to go bust if scientists confirm the initial promise of two performance-enhancing, fat-melting pills that mimic the physiological benefits of exercise without all the sweat.
No, this isn't from the Weekly World News. This might really be something.

Of course, it will probably have some side effect such as dementia or 100 percent impotence. But if scientists can make this exercise in a pill happen, it will be an example of human intelligence at its peak.

For human intelligence at its lowest, check in with these teachers.

Wednesday, July 30, 2008

Coaching products video

One of the things I did down in San Antonio was shoot and edit a video on the products in the exhibit hall that are targeted for coaches. I kept the video to about 90 seconds. If you want to see it, it's here.

Not responsible for broken windshields

I just got back from San Antonio, where I was covering the Texas High School Coaches Association Convention and Coaching School. It was a warm drive back today, but there wasn't a lot of traffic. I did, however, get behind a couple of trucks with signs that said this:

Stay back 200 feet! Not responsible for broken windshields.

I'm sure you've seen those signs, probably as one of the trucks is cutting in front of you, well within 200 feet. I don't really mind that they do that. It's hard to create space in areas where traffic tightens up. But I think the idea of "not responsible for broken windshields" is pretty funny.

It's like the truck company, or driver, has decided that by putting a warning sign on its vehicle that it's in the clear.
So what if a huge rock that I was hauling flew out of my truck and smashed your windshield. Uh ... didn't you see the sign?
I wonder if I could get a sign that says "Stay back 200 feet! Not responsible for anyone who gets in my way."

Tuesday, July 29, 2008

Male lust is blind, according to study

Why is science great?

Well, because it reveals mysteries about human beings, such as this:

Men are really interested in women. Actually, this study did have a pretty interesting finding:
After 300 seconds alone in the same room as a woman they had never met before, and in some cases did not find particularly attractive, the men's testosterone levels of the hormone had shot up by an average of around eight percent.

In other words, we guys are more desparate than picky. Also in the story:
The rising levels may then fuel more visible changes in male behaviour that occur in the presence of a woman, including a squaring of shoulders, an upright posture, and greater use of hands - and even, it is suggested, a flaring of the nostrils.

Yes, greater use of hands. So if a guy is getting a little "handsy," he can blame it on human nature. I'm not sure how that would work in court.

A nude beach, a chihuahua and the police

Mad Libs fill in the blanks:

Nude beach
baton attack

And then pick the location: Portland, Ore.
The dogs ran ashore towards a nude beach, and deputies said it was then the naked suspect started hitting them with a collapsible, police-type baton.

Monday, July 28, 2008

What not to do after a snake bite

If you're bitten by a rattlesnake, what should you do?

Well, here's what NOT to do:
His buddy got the jumper cables and hooked him up to a giant battery for his semi, then fired up the engine. He probably had to put down his beer first to put the clamps on each side of the snake bite,” Rabold said, laughing. “The guy is screaming, yelling and seizing from this treatment; they thought it would somehow break the venom down.

Also, don't ride over a rattler with your dirt bike.

Steve Fossett: the search continues

Elvis is alive!

In the '80s, that headline was on virtually every tabloid cover in grocery-store checkout lanes.

But move over Elvis, it's time for Steve.

Steve Fossett 'may have faked his own death'